Help Steven Colbert Bribe the Comedy Network!

I'm tired of seeing the Black Screen of No. How about you?

It begins thus...

Op-Ed Columinst - The Bigots’ Last Hurrah - NYTimes.com:

Far from terrifying anyone, “Gathering Storm” has become, unsurprisingly, an Internet camp classic. On YouTube the original video must compete with countless homemade parodies it has inspired since first turning up some 10 days ago. None may top Stephen Colbert’s on Thursday night, in which lightning from “the homo storm” strikes an Arkansas teacher, turning him gay. A “New Jersey pastor” whose church has been “turned into an Abercrombie & Fitch” declares that he likes gay people, “but only as hilarious best friends in TV and movies.”

I meant to include the Colbert video in my earlier video compilation, A Mighty Wind is Breaking - it's clearly a winner.

But honestly, I didn't do it because it's a damn pain in the ass for me. Comedy Central and CTV's Comedy Channel do not play nice and so I have to include the proper embed plus a Canadian link. Goddess only knows how many other links I should include. There's a more disturbing situation in the UK. It's a Fox channel, and it's not in sync with the US and Canada.

Is there some special link for Finland or Botswana?

Maybe you guys could come up with some service that, I don't know, perhaps automatically detected what country a person comes from ... oh, wait, you have!

But all it does is tell me I can't WATCH the clip and redirects me to a site where I may or may not be able to find the same clip instead of serving me an ad for Canadian Tire or Tim Horton's, as the God of Cantor and Segel clearly intended. Even sillier, It can't be embedded!

Look guys. We Canadians like you. We like the Comedy Channel, too. (Where else can you find full episodes of Corner Gas?) But this is just strange and ridiculous, and it deserves an equally ridiculous response!

I urge Canadians to ask themselves, "What Would Colbert Do?" Clearly, he'd consider all the proper courses of action - and then bribe someone!

We must empower Steven to bribe the Comedy Channel, the Comedy Network, or perhaps both.

I mean, obviously they must need a few parts or something to make the video embed gadget work properly. Something is missing, and the official apologea - delicate licencing issues - is a clear admission that they don't have a better technical solution for the simple problem of getting us to look at the right ads.

Perhaps they need a router, or a cable. Possibly some "pipe" fitting supplies. In Canada, the first place you think of going when you may need a torch and solder for those fat pipes is Canadian Tire.

Maybe some Nozzle Gel would help! I know Steven would love to say Nozzle Gel on air. Several times.

Please collect FAT wads of Canadian Tire Money (Remember, small, unmarked, well used bills only!). Oh, wait, you probably already have.

Well, I am posing the question over at The Colbert Nation right now, and soon, I hope, we will have an answer. An address to which we can send shrink wrapped pallets of the most stable North American Currency there is. Ron Paul dollars may be hard currency - but this is hardWARE currency!

Clearly any network spokescreature would be hideously embarrassed by being publicly offered a truckload of Canadian Tire Money in order to fix a silly problem. But then, that's the point. So, Canada - head to your glove boxes with rubber bands in hand. A few hundred thousand ones, threes and fives ought to underscore the triviality of the situation!

Long before Ron Paul, JFK tried to give us "hard money."

clipped from www.john-f-kennedy.net On June 4, 1963, a little known attempt was made to strip the Federal Reserve Bank of its power to loan money to the government at interest. On that day President John F. Kennedy signed Executive Order No. 11110 that returned to the U.S. government the power to issue currency, without going through the Federal Reserve. Mr. Kennedy's order gave the Treasury the power "to issue silver certificates against any silver bullion, silver, or standard silver dollars in the Treasury." This meant that for every ounce of silver in the U.S. Treasury's vault, the government could introduce new money into circulation. In all, Kennedy brought nearly $4.3 billion in U.S. notes into circulation. The ramifications of this bill are enormous. With the stroke of a pen, Mr. Kennedy was on his way to putting the Federal Reserve Bank of New York out of business. This is because the silver certificates are backed by silver and the Federal Reserve notes are not backed by anything.

And had he lived, we would not have a 30+ trillion dollar national debt now. I leave "Who shot JFK" for speculation. Why, though, seems pretty damn obvious.

The link will explain how the Federal Reserve creates money out of thin air and then loans it to the Government at interest.

That's one hell of a sweet scam. One you would kill to protect in a hot second if you had a piece of the action.

You see, that thirty + trillion dollars of debt is in part a direct theft by hidden taxation. In other words, if you do a dollar's worth of work and are paid a dollar, but that dollar is invisibly devalued by a dime over the next year, you have been taxed. When you have a currency that is not backed by anything, it's very easy to conceal that tax by manipulating the money supply and interest rates, to complexify the matter beyond the ken of all but those with supercomputer access.

But the fact remains; your savings are not worth as much as they should be, nor can you buy a dollar's worth of goods for your dollar of sweat.

And that is theft. A very complex and sophisticated form of theft, one very dear to the heart of some persuasive thieves, but theft it is.

Remember, all that money (representing economic effort) went to benefit people who had no just reason to profit.

This is always the way when a currency is debased, and it always is debased following the creation of some wonderfully persuasive form of justification for the necessity to replace gold with lead in the coinage.

But it is theft, or at best, taxation by other means, and it its a tax that does not in any way benefit those who are taxed; it goes directly into the hands of bankers in exchange for a fraudulent "service" we do not need.

Ron Paul: The For Profit Candidate

From the department of "DOH, why didn't I think of that" comes an idea so brilliant, so simple and so appropriate it has stunned professional election fundraisers.

It turns out that if you sell people a share in a partisan message in order to make a profit, it sails right by campaign finance laws. In this case, you can help pay for a blimp that pimps Ron Paul, flying over Washington DC and Wall Street, with a final mission to dump tea in Boston Harbor.

From Politico.com:

They shunned traditional mechanisms such as creating an independent non-profit group under section 527 of the IRS code — like Swift Boat Veterans for Truth and the other groups that spent millions on ads in 2004 — or a political action committee — like EMILY’s List. Instead, they went an almost unheard of route, establishing a for-profit company: Liberty Political Advertising.

The name is a nod to Paul’s ideology and the website boasts the “legal arrangement offers the best of both worlds: no limits and virtually no regulations.” In other words, very libertarian.

I can understand how this could have been overlooked. Most politicians prefer not to think of themselves as marketable commodities, even though this is something rather like a professional sex worker objecting to being called a whore.

Anyway, like every other development around the incredible "Little Campaign that Could," it comes not from Ron Paul, but from people who like the idea of Ron Paul, and believe (as do I) that any idea worth having is worth putting out on the street to see how much she can bring in.

Ok, I just offended my own sensibilities with that analogy. But, however it is put, it is what I believe, so let it stand in all it's hilariously inappropriate glory.

UPDATE:

Come to think of it, I did think of making a buck off Ron. I just didn't think BIG enough.

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tag: campaign finance reform, political advertising, FEC, Federal Election Commission, Ron Paul Campaign,

Follow the Money: The root cause of war, poverty and discontent

How Benjamin Franklin Made New England Prosperous « Friends of the American Revolution:

Before the American War for Independence in 1776, the colonized part of what is today the United States of America was a possession of England. It was called New England, and was made up of 13 colonies, which became the first 13 states of the great Republic. Around 1750, this New England was very prosperous. Benjamin Franklin was able to write:

“There was abundance in the Colonies, and peace was reigning on every border. It was difficult, and even impossible, to find a happier and more prosperous nation on all the surface of the globe. Comfort was prevailing in every home. The people, in general, kept the highest moral standards, and education was widely spread.”

And when England's bankers discovered this, they put a stop to it immediately. Hence the Revolutionary war - according to Franklin himself and other historians of the day. The history of the uneasy relationship between the US people and the banks is recorded in even greater depth here.

A comment on that link at Digg underlines the importance of this topic:

Not only is this subject not discussed but neither is the debt, the falling dollar or the deficit. The nimrods running for president seem to think that imposing mirror tarrifs(sic) on China (and others) will solve all of our problems. Money policy will be THE issue for the next several decades. The fact that they are focusing on everything but is indicative of thier ignorance and that they are ill-equipped to run the country.

Friends of the American Revolution and the other link, entitled "AMERICA'S FORGOTTEN WAR AGAINST THE CENTRAL BANKS " seem to suggest government issued "scrip" - essentially printing money according to the demands of the economy for circulating money.

Ron Paul, and other hard currency activists advocate what seems the direct opposite - a return to a currency with a one-to-one reference to an actual stockpiled commodity - such as Liberty Dollars.

But both concepts contain the essence of the same idea - take the money supply out of the hands of those who might be tempted to control it for their own interests. In fact, Paul welcomes the idea of competing currencies - which, with current computer systems, would not be the pain in the tochis that it sounds like. Indeed, there are already viable competing currences. (See Links below.)

Please ignore the "jew banker" nonsense that inevitably crops up in these discussions. Yes, the House of Rothschild figures prominently in all things monetary in Europe, and later in the Americas , going back to the middle ages, when a doctrinal matter essentially gave Jews a monopoly on finance - and few other options. In other words, another case where religious doctrine trumped common sense.

But to suggest that the Rothschilds are interchangeable with "Jews" is laughable. There are poor Jews. And there are immensely wealthy bankers who are not even ethnically Jewish. The canard distracts from the real principle at hand - that it's unwise to tempt anyone's ethics to the degree that the current ability of bankers - especially central bankers - are privileged to enjoy, and that relying on the religious morality of any person - faced with SUCH a pile of lucre - is hardly the safeguard we need.

But on the other hand, we do need some way of addressing the need a Central Banking system was created to deal with - the Boom and Bust cycle. But clearly, the system we have brings greater dangers.

It seems to me that by taking the idea that Ron Paul has thrown out there - a number of different currencies (with different sorts of backing) freely competing against each other, including a federal "hard money" standard reference dollar - we could have have a self-correcting system, based on a wide variety of different sorts of commodities, futures, debts, bonds, real estate holdings, fractional corporate shares and much much more. In other words, a monitory system - indexed to silver and convertible into gold - that is nonetheless directly representative of the economy as a whole.

There would have to be guidelines, of course. And those would have to be Federal guidelines - but they should be simple and direct. And remember, that "this note is legal tender for all debts, public and private" does not preclude other mediums of exchange. It simply establishes that this ONE particular currency is a default currency that is "legal tender," and it is the currency that public debts are monetized in and which all domestic governments will accept (exclusively, at the moment).

LINKS:
http://www.e-gold.com/
http://www.goldmoney.com/
http://www.libertydollar.org/